It's not so much that I haven't trusted God to be who His Word says that He is... or that I haven't trusted the promises in His Word... but I have had to TRUST Him to provide financially in a big way in a very short time. That has been tough. It's all great to say "Yes, God I trust You.." until you actually have to. Until you know that there is no way that this can happen unless He does it... and your mind is racing... and you're playing the what if game.. and you don't want to look like a fool if it doesn't happen. That is when trust gets real.
Over the past few days so many things have happened that remind me that God has got this and that I can trust Him to unfold His plan perfectly. One such event took place on Sunday night at Women's Prayer Group. The group of ladies were asked to share testimonies about what God was doing in their lives and Nancy, the leader of the group, asked if I would share. I had spoken to Nancy about sharing with the group in the past, but I was not prepared for it to happen at that moment!! My mind raced about what to share... I didn't have any pictures... I didn't have any PowerPoint slides... I just had myself... I tried to formulate what I would say... How would I approach it?!! Then, I took a deep breath and remembered one of the words God had spoken through people in the past week... "I step aside". I prayed "God, I step aside..You say what You want to say" and I got up and told His story.
 |
| The sign that hangs beside my front door. |
I shared the story of my journey as God brought it to memory. It was His story told His way. As I sat down after sharing, people looked amazed. I heard a "WOW" from the crowd. It was not the most poetic or the most structured, but even though I had no video or pictures, it touched people in an awesome way. After praying with and for these awesome ladies, one of the ladies, Bonnie came up to me. Bonnie said that she felt that God wanted her to tell me something. Bonnie said that it seemed silly to her, but she was being obedient in sharing it with me. Bonnie looked at me and said "There is a river that flows from the throne of God, and it flows over you..." I started laughing. She continued to explain that there was a fountain that would spring up out of me when I get to Guatemala and that this is just the beginning of what God has planned for me. I just kept laughing. Then, I had to explain to her what was so funny.
Bonnie had no idea that I have a blog, and she is completely unaware that it's called "Crossing Four Rivers" and that it's all themed around rivers and water. So, when she said "There is a river that flows from the throne of God..." I was blown away!! I realized, that this is His river. This is His journey. This is His plan for me, and I need to realize that it is HIS. I need to TRUST Him in this process. In ALL areas of this process.
 |
| A note that is stuck to the wall above my desk. |
I have to choose to trust Him daily. Each morning I get up and I recite "I step aside.. I trust You.. This is Yours.." and many times through out the day I have to remind myself to let go of control and trust Him. It's not always easy. I have very much been striving to be independent and in control for most of my life, and this is something that goes against the way I am "wired". So, I want to encourage each person reading this to trust God. Don't just say that you trust God... but actually TRUST God.
If I have seen one thing in this process it is that He is TRUSTWORTHY. Again and again He has come through. He has provided funding for me to attend training and not have to work when I returned by selling my car in record time, He has provided a reliable vehicle for me to drive in the meantime through the same transaction, He has stretched the money I have to cover what I need until I leave, He has brought people who have been able to step out in faith and sow into Guatemala, He has provided the "cheerleaders" along the way when I am struggling, and He has provided me with awesome prayer warriors that cover me throughout the day and night. I TRUST HIM. This is HIS river.
I thank you for taking the time to read my blog. As always, I treasure your prayers and I love hearing how God is working in your lives as well.
Blessings,
Meaghen
