In my life I've certainly done some brave THINGS... I've worked two summers as an ocean lifeguard putting myself at risk to save others from dangerous surf and currents... I've also survived nine years as a police officer working on patrol (my family STILL doesn't know many of the stories), I've survived my share of car chases, foot chases, I SHOULD have been shot or seriously injured multiple times, I have had someone TRY to run me over with their car (my partner at the time said he saw the car hit me)... but in reality... I know that none of that really has to do with MY BRAVERY.
Before surrendering to the call to ministry on my life, I was working as a police officer in Wiggins,
Me in uniform :) |
Don't misinterpret what my pastor was saying. My pastor was not inviting me to be arrogant and live a life out of a place where "nothing could touch me"... but rather he was assuring me that I am on this earth for a purpose, and until I complete that purpose that God would protect me and keep me until it is time for me to return to Him. If we are living in His will, He provides His providence and protection to us to accomplish His will in our lives. It's like divine life insurance!
Now something to demonstrate how brave I am NOT. :) Two weeks ago, I was offered the opportunity to travel to Escuintla (a city near where I work in Zapote) to see a theatrical performance with the basico students (7th, 8th, and 9th grade). After watching the performance, we walked a short distance to an open lot where there were carnival games set up. I'm not sure what came over me in that moment, but when Evelyn (a secretary and friend at the school) asked me to ride a battering-ram style ride named the Sea Dragon I quickly agreed. This is quite out of character for me, as I usually avoid these types of rides in the U.S... let alone Guatemala which has few if any safety regulations!!
Shortly after taking my seat, I knew I had made a mistake. The ride attendant fastened the bar across our laps (fairly standard).. but then he explained that we needed to hold onto the bars above our heads or we would fall out when the ride flipped upside down... Waaaaaaaiiittt... What?!! Before I could ask for clarification, he started the ride. My thoughts raced... Ok.. no big deal.. centrifugal force right.. it will swing fast.. and we really couldn't fall out.. surely...
Yes.. it's upside down... |
So, as any reasonable person would do.. I started screaming.. IN SPANISH... I screamed "I am going to die.. I am going to die.. please stop.. please stop.." and eventually I even added "I'm going to throw up.." I pushed with all my might into the bars above my head while pushing down with my feet against the floor to hold myself in the seat... Apparently my frantic screams encouraged the ride attendant.. who STOPPED the ride with us UPSIDE DOWN at least three more times.. then came the "death spirals"... I swear he sped that thing up until I was sure it was going to break loose and fling us across the city to a certain death... oh.. and yes.. I was STILL SCREAMING... After what seemed like an eternity.. the ride slowed.. and when it stopped my legs and arms were shaking uncontrollably. Even the kids were talking about how bad their arms and legs hurt after the ride!!
What I didn't expect (other than surviving) was how entertained all the students were by my performance. At least a dozen times they asked me "Were you scared? How can you scream so loud? What were you screaming?" In their eyes... IT WAS HILARIOUS. I declined when they invited me to go on the ride again... I try to keep my near-death experiences to one a day when possible. However, I can say that that experience served as quite the "ice-breaker" for some of the students and myself. Now when I walk down the hall, many of them greet me and talk to me where before they were somewhat unsure of me (or if I even could speak Spanish).
So, even though I will NEVER again venture onto a Guatemalan carnival ride... I will say this... In the midst of my crazy screaming and fear of certain death.. I started to pray.. and the peace of God met me in that place. I'm pretty sure God was laughing at me too... but I remembered what my pastor said years ago. If we are in God's will.. He will protect us... So, I want to challenge you (and myself)... What is burning in your heart today? What crazy adventure is stirring in your heart and your mind? Are you letting fear hold you back? I would challenge you to step out. If He is calling you out on the water, He will not let you sink. Step out of the boat and don't let fear hold you back. This reminds me of lyrics to one of my favorite songs "You split the sea so I could walk right through it.. My fears are drowned in perfect love.." There is no room for fear in His love. So be bold, and go forth in His love. (He'll even be there if you get on a crazy carnival ride along the way).
Thank you for reading my blog. I appreciate having each of you on this journey with me.
Blessings,
Meaghen
P.S. While I was writing this we had a "small" earthquake.. Ha ha ha.. talk about being brave!! :0